Freaky Friday

This is the name Avril (because she looks like Avril Lavigne) and I have come up with having spent the last 3 Friday's together amid giggles and alcohol... tonight is no exception although this time its a more low key affair at my flat... Roomie is apparently on 'date night' so the disruption will either spoil their plans or force her and the bf to go to his flat, either way I'm happy :p

Exams are around the corner and if I told you I was a little underprepared I'd be making a hugely sweeing statement... I am screwed!

Mr S is firmly settled in next door although some of his things seem to be lingering here despite me asking him to move them.  Despite his recent fuck up resulting in a girl stalking him and what can only be described as a total disaster in dating terms... he decided to get back on the horse and went out on yet another date this Wed - no surprise that he told me one thing and it turned out he was doing another... not that I had been checking up but had to ask due to a landlord/flat situ.  

I'm feeling pretty happy in my own skin at the moment and him moving out has definately been what I needed despite the fact he is now my neighbour (did I tell you about that? hmm I'll need to read a few of my earlier blogs).  Anyway a trip to the hairdressers yesterday has seen me leave with two bright red slices through my hair - slightly punkish and most definately awesome!  And I've spent my entire bonus on gig tickets and fun things :D

Anyway... tonight Avril and I are going to make a 'to do' list for the summer so I'll keep you informed on what we decide and you can have a giggle as I attempt to tick some of it off.

Flowers

I had planned on telling you about my previous flatmates today, but a surprise delivery has kind of knocked me a little...

A bunch of flowers and a box of chocs arrived at my door this afternoon with a card from Balloo saying thanks for being a good friend.  I went to visit him at dad's where he has moved for a while last weekend as I felt like he had some things on his mind.  Again my blog not his so I won't say anymore but the arrival of fowers to say thanks is a little out of character, don't get me wrong they are gorgeous (as you can see), I just hope I haven't missed something.

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The Rembrandts, I'll be there for you:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=835DW5oYbzE

Flat(not so)mates

The cracks have begun to show with the new flatmate... she has taken over almost sole use of the downstairs cupboard which is 15ft high and holds a crap load of stuff.  I have one backpack and a fold down pasting table in it only and she asked this morning if I can store them on my landing?!!?!  Erm no!

Also, there is a weird cubby hole thing on my landing where I keep washing and I awoke this morning to it full of black bin bags of her stuff... not just 1 or 2 but 6... 6 sodding black bin bags staring me in the face every day when I get up?!?!  I told her this morning that it isn't not ideal and she needs to think about moving them.

Let me put this into perspective for you... As well as the downstairs mega-cupboard she has sole use of the only cupboard in the living room and 1/2 the kitchen cupboards.  I live in the only upstairs room and so the bags were essentially in my room!  Also, despite the fact I will never use her bathroom other than for the toilet (as I have a teeny en suite) and obviously when guests come as its the only communal one (which by the way I clean the toilet every week to compensate for this)... the 4 tampons I left in the bathroom cupboard have been taken out and put on my stairs.  I mean wtf!! Its 4 tampons which at some point I will need to use, hence the reason they were in the bathroom! It is interesting to note that the bathroom scales I own have not been moved as she is on a diet and uses them daily so deemed them fit to keep.

Also, her bf is here 99% of the time she is staying over and despite the fact he is a nice guy and I have no issues with him I sooooooo didn't sign up to live with a couple and she made a bloody point of saying that wouldn't be the case! And why do they stay here anyway when he has a flat all to himself!  Why didn't she just move in with him??

Man it feels good to vent!  I mean I've had some stonking flatmates in the past which I think I might tell you about in my next blog and Roomie is far from the worst but I just don't get her at all.

I think I have allowed a fruit loop to move into my flat.

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No song today, but I will leave you with this internet gem I found cunningly entitled 'how to lose a roommate in 10 days'

http://www.innocentenglish.com/best-funny-jokes/online-dating-site-jokes/roommate-jokes-lose-bad-roomate-10-days.html

Circles

I seem to wander in circles through life and i'm sure i'm not the only one...

2-3 years seems to be the duration of my circles...

• The time it took for both long term relationships to come to an end
• The time it took for me to lose interest in my first University course and the time it has taken for me to start slacking off in the second.
• The longset I have ever worked for one company before moving on.
• The longest I have lived in one place (this flat).

Yeah I'm definately a girl with a short attention span.  I need spontaneity, change and surprises.  I thrive on creativity and I just don't think i'm someone who can be happy with the mundane, the predictable or the ordinary.  I know this isn't a bad thing but looking at the bigger picture its almost impossible to find that... unless of course you are filthy rich (which i'm not), or never want to have the nice things in life (which I do).

Win Borden once said:

'If you wait to do everything until you're sure its right, you'll probably never do much of anything'

Freedom, liberation and the thing that saves me or at least takes me out of the mundane is music (if you hadn't already guessed)... Music takes me back to places I used to be and propells me to places I know I'm heading for.  I know that probably sounds really anal and self-absorbed but at the same time I think music probably does that for a lot of people.  Oh yes, I love music!  In the past i've had a piano, a flute, a bass and a drumkit... these days its just me and my guitar but still... that guitar is a little piece of sanity.

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A great summer song from 1999:  Unpretty, TLC

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3QhW1bUYO4U

Roller Derby

The people from the tv show were meant to be here on Thursday but I wimped out, came up with some utterly lame excuse and eliminated myself... hmmm.

Thinks with Roomie are going ok but her bf is here alllllllllll the time, he is a really nice guy and I actually like him but when she isn't at his house he is here and its beginning to grate a little.  I've decided to give it another few weeks in case its the new-ness of living in the same city and they will give each other a little more space after a while.  I'll let you know how it goes.

Its suuuuuper sunny here today, most probably like where you are sat right now, the sun somehow seems to make things better and living in the UK more bareable... Smiling faces, colourful clothes and less hustle and bustle as people take time to walk to where they are going and seem to stroll rather than speed walk.  Yep, i'm definately a girl who was made to live somewhere in the sunshine!

I saw the film whip-it on Saturday with Mr S, what a great movie! 

I used to love rollerskating when I was younger.  A year or so ago I wanted to buy a pair to get back into it but couldn't find anyone to join me... I think i'm just going to sod it and get some this week :o)  I also found a local roller derby team which I didn't know existed until recently... in fact when I was looking to get back into it the only thing I could think of was roller-disco and that didn't really appeal to me... If only I had known!  Anyway they seem to train when I'm working but the next set of try-outs are in May so I think I might go along and see if I can work something out if I get in.

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Lollypop - The Chordettes
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hWL1jbUYfsg

Calorie Counting

Why is it that almost every girl I know is on a diet at the moment?  Red is counting calories despite looking increasingly gaunt in the face, all the girls at work are either on diets or have signed up for 'boot camp' - 2hrs of what can only be described as painful insanity 4 days a week at the park behind my flat.

I've never been on a diet, don't get me wrong, I could probably do with losing a few pounds and have even started to change the way I eat this year and have lost just under 10kg so far but I just don't buy into this whole 'don't eat anything bad' and 'exercise until you are miserable' nonsense.

I mean there are other ways to lose weight, eating a little bit less than you want, cutting out 60/70% of snacks rather than all of them and more bareable types of exercise than running round the park pushing a tractor tyre while some middle aged wannabe drill sergent is screaming in your ear - no thankyou!!

It takes more calories to eat and digest a stick of celery than is in the celery itself - fact!  Doing housework can burn just as many calories as a cardio workout at the gym if done with enough feist, chewing gum burns calories, and as for enjoyable... vigarous sex is also high on the calorie burning list although disappointingly, an orgasm only burns a mere 7 calories.

My advice?   

Grab your guy, get on top, have a giggle and while you are up there chew gum, have a stick of celery for eating in your left hand and the hoover in your right - talk about a multi-tasking genius!  A happy bf, a clean flat and a skinny you!  And if you really want to show off... double up and turn the 7 for an O(hhhh) into 14 by doubling up :o)

And for the more advanced among of we females... the correct outfit!  You guys are probably totally oblivious to this but looking all sex kitten like - actually quite difficult and corset wearing must burn at least 200 calories (no word of a lie), those things were not designed for solo-dressing, its all arms, elbows and twisting to push, shove and suck things into place.

A tasty treat for those of you who have enjoyed today's blog and think perhaps weightloss the serendipity way sounds like more fun:  http://www.c4vct.com/kym/humor/csex.htm

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Stacie Orrico, More to Life

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wUOcQnWbk_U

The last 2 weeks

The last two weeks have been a bit of a whirlwind so I'll try fill you in and get you up to speed without boring you to tears...

Salisbury

I went to Salisbury with Balloo for Herb and Barron's flatwarming, it was a great trip, we did lots of catching up, injured ourselves getting a bit too into wii sports plus and the hat party was a hit.  I ended up option for a cheeky sailors hat and hooking up Balloo with a pirate hat but it was pretty much a hat swapping game all night.

There was a quite a good looking guy there and lots of flirting was had but it was all in good humour and he ended up leaving last.  The guys that Herb and Barron had thought I would be attracted to turned out to be of no interest but nice all the same.

The night ended with a bit of a heart to heart in the kitchen with Barron who said I seemed to pick the wrong type of guy and I need to focus on more outgoing people to compliment me as I'm a bit sporadic and that he will 'vet potentials' in the future if I ask.  Balloo pretty much said the same and stayed on point for the latter part of the evening as I think he thought it might result in a hook-up and he didn't seem to keen on my choice of guy.

Mr S

Mr S finally returned to the flat a couple of days before I went to Salisbury saying he wanted to talk and sort the friendship out.  As I've said before this is a blog for my life not his so I don't want to go into where he has been or doing what as to out that information should be his choice not mine.  In short he had moved in with a girl he was going out with, he moved back and ended it and realised he had been a bit of an ass to me.

I got a really nice email from him while I was away and after coming back and thinking it over for a few days we sat down to talk last Sat and decided to try and make our friendship work.  He also seems to have a lot going on but again his story not mine.  We went out to the cinema and grabbed a takeout on Sunday and since then things have been ok.  Small steps so not to get trampled on or hut but yeah... I'm glad at how things have ended.

Flat

Mr S moved out this week and my new flatmate moved in (don't think I have given her a name yet so from now on lets call her Mod - she used to be one).  Mod and I sat down last night after she had 'officially' moved in and had a few glasses of wine - I think we will get on well as flatmates fingers crossed.

Tonight we are having a few people over for drinks and nibbles.

Mr S... and here is the bit you may question as a few of my friends have.  But Mr S is moving into the flat across the hallway, same block of flats, same floor but 3 doors down in 10 days so we will be neighbours.  I'm not sure if I'm making a mistake or heading for another fall but I just can't seem to cut someone who has been my best friend and my rock for such a long time out my life, despite recent times.  I'm really glad he is moving just along the hallway as hope we can get our friendship back on track and stay in each others lives - am I fooling myself?

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Just a great song I am listening to a lot lately (Jared Leto has a great voice):

30 Seconds to Mars, This is War

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMAVLXk9QWA

Married

Since I blogged last I met the man of my dreams and everything was a whirlwind... we went to vegas last weekend and tied the knot.

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Sheryl Crow, A change:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uxSsGXjDq6c


ps:  April Fools :p
.

Respite

This will be my last blog for a few days as i'm jetting off for an appointment this evening and then straight over to Herb and Barron's house for the flatwarming tomorrow with Balloo... I'm sure i'll have some juice gossip for you when I get back.

Mr S stayed in the flat for the first time in about 3 weeks last night, he rocked in about 10pm and wanted to talk but it was the last thing I needed yesterday so I was polite but declined and headed upstairs.  He text me today to say he is hoping to 'fix' our friendship and implied he will be back at the flat a little more until he moves out in order to do this... we will see

Anyway adios amigos... have a good weekend

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Kelly Clarkson, Since you've been Gone
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdxRS_GyBbM

Full of Grace

'Tuesdays child is full of grace'

I have 101 deadlines for Uni this week and am going out of my mind trying to fit in the time to get them all done - I'm shattered and am most definately not full of grace.

The silver lining is that on Friday I'm heading down to see 'herb' and her bf, my ex flatmate and the guy I set her up with (what shall we call him hmmm Barron) with another one of our mutual friends (who I will call) Balloo.  I'm really looking forward to it,  I've known herb since my first day in secondary school so about 18yrs now and have known Barron and Balloo for 11yrs.  Herb and Barron have just moved house so they have organised a flatwarming party around our arrival with the theme of 'silly hat'.  A quick visit to ebay last night has ensured that both Balloo and I will be hooked up with head attire for a captain and a pirate - love it!

My boss gave me a bottle of champers  and a box of chocs at work last night for my team's performance over the last fortnight - about time!  Being a part-time team the guys miss out on a lot and a bad few hours can knock their stats for an entire week.  It also just goes to show that despite the disaster that is lil ole me at the moment my game of make-believe, falsty and keeping up the pretence to all concerned that I'm lil Miss on-top-of-everything is still on form.

We've had a giggle the last few weeks as the majority of us are Uni students and have developed what can only be described as 'the deadline look' - The right eye somewhat bigger than the left, the left eye having developed a twitch, bad skin, unkempt hair, either a foot or a set of fingers that won't stop moving, a tone of voice that jumps around more than a drunk dude at a punk-rock gig, and an un-natural addiction to all things sugary and full of caffine - oh yeah, we are a colourful bunch at the moment and with exams around the corner I imagine things will only get more interesting from here on in.

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MGMT, Time to pretend

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9GH-yvPHSY

Seriously?!?

Mr S who hasn't been back to the flat for approx 3wks as he has moved in with someone he met that Sunday he went out text me today to say he missed me as a friend.  He then orchastrated a trip to the flat when I was at work so to miss me....

ARRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

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I picked this song mainly for the chorus, but this video brought a much needed smile to my face.
Kellis, I hate you
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmXwpPRbVSM

One Art

The art of losing isn't hard to master;
so many things seem filled with the intent
to be lost that their loss is no disaster,
Lose something every day. Accept the fluster
of lost door keys, the hour badly spent.

The art of losing isn't hard to master.
Then practice losing farther, losing faster:
places, and names, and where it was you meant
to travel. None of these will bring disaster.


I lost my mother's watch. And look! my last, or
next-to-last, of three beloved houses went.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.


I lost two cities, lovely ones. And, vaster,
some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent.
I miss them, but it wasn't a disaster.


-- Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture
I love) I shan't have lied. It's evident
the art of losing's not too hard to master,
though it may look like (Write it!) a disaster.
 
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Elizabeth Bishop

'begun is half done'

I probably couldn't have picked a better year to start blogging if I had tried.

This year seems set to be one of great change, deliberation, turbulance personal challenge.  Its only March and I feel like I've been on an emotional rollercoaster for what seems like forever.

Truth time.  So far, I've written about six different things in this box for today's blog and have deleted them all.  I can't seem to make a decision at the moment big or small, and as for essay/report writing and Uni deadlines, well...

If this course wasn't so important to me I think I'd be pulling a Mary Poppins and jumping on that oh so familiar band wagon of packing my things and going somewhere new.

Oh well, I guess I'll just keep on truckin'

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New Radicals, You get what you give
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DL7-CKirWZE

Floating

I feel like i'm floating in time just now, going nowhere, doing nothing and numb to it all.  Its weird, I feel like I'm watching my life pass by sat in a glass box somewhere inside my head but if i'm here... who is driving?

I've been through a lot in my life and managed to bounce back pretty well so its perplexing to me that this time I'm somehow lost.  The last few weeks worth of blogs have pretty much followed the theme of being stuck in a rut and I think somewhere along the road I've stopped trying to dig myself out - this needs to change.

Jeremy Taylor said that 'Love is friendship set on fire'  if thats true then right now the only thing left is a pile of ash and memories and all I need is a good gust of wind...

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Snow Patrol - Chocolate
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FT62Gwv70kM

Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia

Ok lets see if I can get you up to speed

In short: Life in the flat is slowly coming together, work is going ok despite the smirk the crazy pills pasted all over my face last night and with any luck I'll get the essays/reports for my Uni deadlines fired out and handed in by the middle of next week.

And the Longer version...

Flat

A friend of a friend came to see the flat on Monday and she is definately moving in, its just a case of her working out when but it will be by the end of the month at the latest.

Mr S hasn't been back to stay for almost 2 weeks, he has practically moved in with some girl he met that Sunday night (as far as I know) and only dropped in for a few mins last Saturday to do his dishes.  Mouldy Laundry and the rest of the rubbish still sitting where I left it.

Work

I had my APR last night, it was due in December but due to my managers lack of organisational skills was 3 months late.  In a 'real' job, I'd have gone wild at this prospect as it meant my scores and bonus related pay were submitted before any evidence could be submitted or a discussion could take place, here however, the discussion is merely a paper exercise.  The entire meeting took 8mins, I had written a total of 128 words (he counted).  Don't get me wrong I deliberatly refrained from submitting preperation as at IPR time I went in all guns blazing (as that is always what has been expected in my previous positions) and it was a total waste of time/breath so I refused to head in this time for a repeat performance. 

Its rare that someone can get under my skin in a work related situation (at least on the outside), but when his attempt to berate me for my lack of preperation was met with a smirk rather than a look of deliberation it was game over and we called the meeting to an end.  

Everything Else

I'm feeling a little sick with the tablets today, and only managed to get 4hrs sleep before waking, bright eyed and bushy tailed.  I do however feel like maybe I could sit down and work towards some of my Uni deadlines this afternoon - hurrah!

Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia:  A phobia impossible to admit to (ironically amusing)

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The theme song of my week:  Gavin DeGraw, I don't wanna be
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kJzR6SBpVnA&feature=fvst

Smarties

I wasn't sure if I should post this next bit of info, but when I started out on this blog journey I wanted it to be the good, the bad and the ugly... my life on a plate, so really, there was no choice.

Despite being the girl who can bounce back from everything, the rock that most people lean on etc.  I have hit a really deep dark patch with this whole thing and scared myself in the week that I fell off blog planet land. 

Anyway everything climaxed the other day when I found myself sat on my bedroom floor hacking away at the flesh on my arms with any sharp object I could get my hands on.  I started with scissors, went to a knife in the kitchen drawer when that wasn't cutting enough and even resorted to smashing a class and using the chard's to ensure I could get as deep as possible.  What stopped me from completing the job?  Not pain, or uncertainty in my actions, but the knowledge that behind I would leave my mum and who would take care of her when I was gone.  She already struggles to get up in the morning and stay on track since dad died and I couldn't add to that by applying any kind of guilt.  My days training as a nurse paid off, I stitched myself up and am now accessorising every day with long sleeved tops and an array of very chunky bangles.

I went to the docs a few days later and left with an appointment to go and see someone and a prescription for 'happy pills'.  I'm ashamed that this is what it has come to as its like admitting failure?

Anyway, crazy amounts of deliberation and here I am.

I started taking the tablets only a day ago and the side effects have already kicked in (which according to a few online forums I've been on, seems to be the norm).  I would probably have kept this whole thing to myself but I think perhaps including this in my journey might make for a few interesting and laughable events.

I slept 3 hours last night in total and have more energy today than I have ever had despite being quite an active person.  The only thing I can put it on par with is an adrenalin rush and wow am I rushing!  I could quite easily run round my living room screaming at the top of my lungs for a few hours, hold down a conversation with several people all at once and give John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever a run for his money busting shapes on the dancefloor. 

You would think I could throw out a couple of essays for these looming deadlines in about 20mins right now but no.... my head is running waaaaaay too fast for anything else... How i'm managing to get this down for you guys is actually beyond me at the moment.  I'm typing this as I'm standing up and rocking out to some tunes on MTV.

This is mental!!

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The ONLY song right now:  Song 2, Blur
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SSbBvKaM6sk

Peripetia

When I was about 20/21 I applied through channel4 to appear on a new tv show they were about to launch a pilot for called shipwrecked (yep thats right).  Anyway I got into the final 50 through telephone interviews, photos and a quick chat with scouts, a few weeks later I met with the producers but didn't make the final cut of 35 and so didn't get onto the show.  After that a few of the assosiated companies kept my details on file and from time to time I get a call to see if I am interested in taking part in a show but nothing has caught my interest... until now.

I got a call yesterday from Hattrick productions to see if I would be interested in taking place in a new dating show, a cross between come dine with me and blind date.  I took a deep breath, said yes and took place in a really random telephone conversation/interview the outcome of which was a resounding 'you are exactly the type of person we are looking for'.  The film crew are coming to my flat in two weeks to talk to me for 20mins on camera and to determine if we move forward.  I'm nervous and apprehensive but I figured I might as well introduce myself to this dating game again with a bang.

Yep, its time to don the wading boots once again and tramp my way through this mess.

Peripetia:  A sudden change in fortune

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You can pretend... but we both know this song is legendary!  And screw your boyzone version, Billy Ocean kicks ass!!


Billy Ocean, When the going gets tough
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kx2Y_a_yGyY