Wicked World Of Fetish

So a few of you have requested that I revisit the world of fetish as part of this weeks attempt to give you an honest 21st century chicks perspective on sex. I think fetishism is a huge topic to cover and so while later I may post about some of the more unusual fetishes out there; today I shall give you a more personal view (eek).

If you have been reading this blog a while, you will know that fetishism is something that I've blogged about once before, however for you new readers, the only fact you really need to know is that this little chick is pro-fetish. That doesn't mean that I have a cupboard full of deep dark and fetishes myself (I have yet to uncover that one crazy thing that makes me go all Va VaVoom), but I am open to suggestion, and am liberated enough to have tried a few in the past - either at my own suggestion or my partners and why not?  I believe that fetishism can be an awesome way to spice up a sex life and if you stumble upon something that turns you on beyond belief along the way, then lucky you!   Regular sex is awesome, there is no denying that; but for this little chick an adventure every now and then is definitely something I tend to embrace, even if that does result in uncontrollable giggles or a firm 'no this isn't for me'.  

So here we go, a list of some the sexual fetish experiences I have embarked on:

Retifism & Podophilia

Shoe and/or Foot fetish.

Being a woman who has feet(size 3/4), I've had a fair few compliments on my 'dainty-ness', and several (some unusually) placed offers of a foot massage - friends, coaches, shoe sales people?? in the past; 99% of which I've declined. I find feet scary, mine less so, but in general... ugly, and the thought of anyone touching mine, let alone licking or sucking makes me anxious.  Equally wearing insanely uncomfortable shoes to highlight the attractiveness of my feet is somewhat perplexing to me (Although I may marry the guy that buys me that killer pair of black/red Louboutins).  However, as with most things in life, there is always an exception to the rule and as I know a couple of rather vocal foot fetishists I have actually attended a birthday party whereby crazy shoes were mandatory, toe sucking did occur (not mine), and a 'sexy foot catwalk' was held.  If you were wondering... I did feel obliged to enter, and  I came third. lol

Sex in public places

Not to be confused with voyeurism or exhibitionism.

I think most people at some point have embraced sex in a public place, and I can't say this is something that is high on my sexual to-do list, but I have dated someone who discovered this world of 'should we be doing this, will we get caught' really made him tick.

During my Uni days when I was dating Clutz we literally could not get enough of each other.  Any opportunity at all that presented itself for us to sneak into another room and tear off our clothes was taken.  Don't get me wrong, we had a seriously sensuous sex life and an appreciation for the lingering sublime, but when presented with an opportunity... rarely did it go to waste.  The discovery that that Clutz was into more risky ventures came into realisation however one fireworks night.  

Living in a block of flats where everyone was a medical/nursing student pretty much meant an open door policy with a few locations tending to be the regular hot-spots for socialisation; my flat was one of these.  On Guy Fawkes night one year we all organised to go to the local display, wooly gloves and sparklers at the ready.  I had just finished a shift at the hospital and so Clutz and I arranged to meet everyone there slightly later.  I got showered, changed and ready to go, but with the opportunity of an empty flat one thing led to another... So when groups of people started to unexpectedly reappear in our kitchen/dining/living room to watch the display out the window because 'the weather had taken a turn', little did they know that the seemingly 'innocent cuddle' taking place on the chair directly in front of said window actually constituted of my panties pulled to one side and Clutz erect and now exploding penis inside.  I could barely contain my embarrassment and amusement at the situation, but stuck there as we were, I also couldn't get up and relocate without exposing him.  It was the most scary 20mins of my life!  It did however act as a giant neon sign in terms of awakening a fetish for Clutz, and in the years that followed I helped him tick a few interesting locations off his list:  Sex on a night bus, Oral sex while stuck in traffic (he nearly crashed the car), an interesting trip to the Museum of Modern Art in Dublin, and the most amusing: Sex (at night) on the center pitch of a well known UEFA qualifying football team.  It's a good job social media and camera phones weren't as widely used back then!

Stigmatophilia

Arousal from piercings and/or tattoos

In the dictionary this is defined as a 'sexual perversion' and relates to either the pleasure gained when getting tattoos/piercings, or the sexual attraction to others who have them.  I can safely say, I have both.

As you know bloggers I have a couple of well placed tattoos and a few dermal's/piercings although I often no longer wear them. While I didn't glean any satisfaction from having a tattoo, the rush however, during and after being pierced definitely releases the kind of adrenaline that for me, pushes a certain button.  I'm not into genital, eyebrow, nose, or facial piercings, nor do I think any and every tattoo is attractive; in fact, I find the majority tacky (so I'm not sure where this places me on the stigmatophilia scale), but certain piercings and tattoos definitely pique my interest more than a little.  A pierced lip on guy, especially if it is a hoop and at the side... absolutely turns me on, and a well done tattoo sleeve even more so.  Pierced lips on women don't tend to have the same effect, but a well placed dermal on a hip or collar bone for example... lush!  You could argue that stigmatophilia is perhaps just a physical preference, but I would have to disagree.  I like dark hair and eyes also, but that combination doesn't even come close to the carnal attraction I feel when a hot punky-funky guy catches my eye in a bar.  Beeze!

BDSM

Bondage, Discipline, Dominance and Submission.

I used to think everyone had dabbled in BDSM at some point.  I mean, as with anything there is a scale depending on how far you want to go, but as well known as it is, it made sense to me that the majority of people had dipped in a toe.  Recently however I've come to realise that the majority of people out there haven't even been tied up... shocking really.  

I love a bit of BDSM.  I don't consider anything I've done that extreme in terms of this fetish, especially as I tend to incorporate elements into every sexual relationship I've ever embarked on with the exception of Cherry who expressed his apprehension almost instantly and so respecting his 'hard line' didn't pursue things, no wonder we didn't work out!

I know when you really delve into this world you tend to take on a role, either that of the dominant or the submissive (cue the references to 50 shades), but to glean elements... I think it allows sexual partners to earn trust, discover each others bodies, and more importantly, learn what makes the person you are sleeping with tick.  If you can't move, and you cant see, not only do your senses awaken, but you are almost forced into communicating how each touch feels - what is good, what is bad, what turns you on when your inhibitions are somewhat stifled because you have relented control.  It is a game of trust, trust needs to be earned and built upon, but a game never the less I see many advantages in playing, even if rarely.  

BDSM isn't something you can jump straight into,  enjoyment and pleasure go straight out the window if the only thought running through your mind is that of sheer terror.  Nervousness however, now that's a whole other ball game completely.  Nervousness, when you know, and trust the other person, can be arousing in itself and so be whether your preference be that of a 101 approach, or taking it to extremes, BDSM is one fetish that this little chick firmly approves of.  So where have I taken this journey? 

• Domination / Submission
• Restraints/Bondage (handcuffs, silk scarves, blindfolds...  It doesn't have to be scary)
• Whipping/Spanking/Flogging (not really my thing but fun at times and embraced in the past due to a partners lust for this particular nuance)
• Role play
• Wax play
• Dressing up

There are definitely some hard lines for me in terms of BDSM, I know without even trying that Humiliation, Water Sports, Coprophilia, Medical play, CBT, Electrostimulation and Tickle Torture are most definitely out, but there are still a few explorations that I would want to tick off my sexual bucket list. Suspension (helloooo sex swing), Spreader bars, further domination/submission role play and most definitely wax play (something unexpectedly found that I do enjoy, but in the past have found partners either perplexed by the concept or reluctant to partake for fear of pain or inflicting pain (I don't think they really got the point lol), are high on my to-do list.

So. I think without turning my blog into some kind of sexual story, or this entry into an essay, I have made a reasonable attempt at talking about my experiences with all things fetish.  Of course there are many other experiences I could have told you about, and there are more than a few items still left on my sexual bucket list, but there is a whole week ahead of us, and some things... Well, they can wait for another day ;)

If you are interested in the previous blog on this topic where I talk about: Looners, Technosexuality, Furry Fandom, Objectophilia, Sploshing and Pedal Pumping, click here.

Metric - Torture Me

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