Much has changed since I last posted, and yet many things have stayed the same.
I'm back in the workplace rocking a project based role which I am hoping will be the gateway to something bigger and better come next year. As someone who has always juggled responsibilities, I can safely say that despite the company I work for being a global organisation, I have never experienced such utter chaos. The hours are long, the light is waaaaay down the tunnel, the stress levels are high, but the people, well, the people are pretty great (for the most part). It is taking all the gumption I have to stick it out, but I will.
Health wise, things are as to be expected, 70hr weeks are taking it out of me and I'm constantly exhausted both mentally and physically. My arm is like a pin cushion and my foundation and cunningly chosen clothes veil the surface of my skin. I am the girl with an unfortunately lengthy 'cold'. My team bring me lemsip and water and I make all the right appreciative noises.
My friends... they are fantastic. I am a truly lucky person to have so many great people in my life. Herb and Barron celebrated their 1st wedding anniversary a few days ago and came into town. Barron hurt his eye so had to stay home, but Herb and I rocked it old school and hit up the local Oktoberfest where we had a blast. Clio and I regularly meet for coffee and to giggle over nonsense while putting the world to rights, and Evanescance as always is my rock. She and I rely on each other for emotional support on a daily basis... never has a stranger friendship been formed.
My family are doing well. My nephews have grown so much in the last couple of years. We are forming new lines of play and walking the delicate line between aunt/nephew and friendship. The fact we are walking this line at all I take as a true testament to my aunty-ing skills. It is a special bond, and one I am fortunate to have made. My eldest brother got engaged towards the end of the summer and to help mend brotherly bridges I organised a dinner. Dysfunctional as we are on paper, I don't think much could break the bonds of our family, despite the strains. I only wish they themselves reached out once in a while. It is strange being the youngest and yet always acting as the glue. Mum is also doing well, she has found her feet and it is beginning to feel like I have a parent again. I think an opportunity to step up and be the strength to my weakness bizarrely acted as the final trigger in what has been a really long path.
Love life wise I haven't really been looking. To coin a phrase... There have been bigger fish to fry. That doesn't however mean love hasn't been looking for me. There have been many flirts and several opportunities have presented since I last blogged. Most of which I have declined... some things never change. I have found myself to be quietly confident again despite feeling uncomfortable in my own skin (a battle I will fight until my last day). Men hotter than I, have been doing the chasing, and it has nice to feel like a commodity. My job sees me in a highly exposed role, and my cheery disposition has served me well. My natural mojo found itself and being back in the race has only served to sex me up.
I joined tinder a few weeks ago with friends. We coined a whattsapp group to share our comedy finds, potentials and to discuss our dating lives. For once, I am not a lone girl trying to embrace fun and serendipity; This time I am part of a trio and I couldn't be happier. We are heading out to several events over Halloween (we all love it) and it will be the first time we have seen each other in the flesh for a few weeks, however we link in each evening like clockwork for a quick girly chat and comedy kodak comparison.
I've a few dates over the next few weeks, and I am also meeting up with Clerk for dinner/drinks (Herb thinks there is more to our meets than either Clerk or I have realised... I think she is probably right). There is one date however that feels different. A guy I've talked to for a week now and for some reason is rather on my mind. He is exceptionally open and honest in many ways, and yet I feel there is more to him than meets the eye. I can't quite put my finger on it but there's something about him that reminds me of me and it is quite perplexing. We are meeting for the first time in person on Friday. He has made a point of saying he prefers to get to know someone a little before meeting so everything isn't based on first impressions... Another reason I am curious as he has been quite open, both verbally and with pictures. As you know, I tend to like remaining closed until I know who I am talking to is who they say they are. and so after pushing a little meeting on Friday has been our 'middle ground'.
For the first time in a long time I am actually nervous for all the right reasons. Not because I am head over heels and can't see the wood for the trees, but because something I can't quite work out has unexpectedly 'clicked'. Don't get me wrong, I could meet this guy and either one of us could call the date a lemon. I could equally pull the usual Ser3ndipity move and decide he is a great guy, but not someone I want to pursue anything with. I just don't think either of those things is going to happen and I can't explain why...
My instincts rarely let me down so I know there has to be more than I'm bargaining for. If only I could pin point what it is they are currently trying to tell me.
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