"This is clean"

It is so hard to take life with two hands, why is it that despite our best intentions people always end up in a perpetual loop of boring apart from a lucky few.

I'll take an unemployed carpenter (you should get that if you follow the tunes I post) a cool riff and an adventure if you don't mind.  

Things people don't do enough of but should because lets face it... Life rocks much more when you do.

1.  Dancing

2.  Singing

3.  Paddling in the sea

4.  Wearing shorts in the sunshine

5.  Playing on a swing

6. Riding a bike bike/skateboard/surfing/skiing/rollerskating

7.  Playing music

8.  Water fight

9.  Team sports (basketball, football, rugby, roller derby, rounders)

10. Hopscotch

11. Changing your image

12. Dancing (yes... again)

13. Sex

Seriously, think about it... If you dedicated an hour of your life each day to one of the things on the list above.  Life would be sweeeeet!

Cake - Short Skirt/Long Jacket

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Rockin' A Rainbow

Well... To say my hair didn't turn out exactly to plan is somewhat of an understatement.  What should have been epic actually turned out to be... oh dear!

Colour B4 lied to me!! It said I could indeed dye my hair the desired colour after using it to strip out all the built up colour and darkness first.  I can safely say that colour B4 lied to me.  What should have been a really rich and intense red with pink undertones (here what I said there... pink!  I specifically picked the dye because most reds offer a red/orange and I wanted red/pink).  Ok so it is clear that I got pink in some form but we all know the plan wasn't for early 90s psychedelic tie-dye hair.  I most definitely was not going for flourescent pink at the front, rapidly followed by banana yellow, satsuma orange, and then some kind of dusky pink/ginger mix.

I was left with three options...

1.  Cry

2.  Cry and then panic dye my hair again which could either help or hinder the situation.

3.  Fuck it

As I was due to meet Red for our booked random event.  A screening of Topgun (I'd never seen before) in a central bar in the middle of town with a meal and a bottle of wine I went with option 3.

I took public transport.

I glared at anyone that looked at me the wrong way.

I met Red.

Red was shocked I hadn't cancelled.

I had macaroni cheese which make me feel better

We had the option of chardonnay or sauvingnon blanc with dinner - I was unimpressed.

I picked the sauvingnon blanc.

I absolutely ordered dessert.

My evening was equally brightened by a mini text conversation with Beeze before I told him I was heading to bed in order to keep myself from entering flirt territory.  Damn that man is fine.

To tell you the truth I think I might have to wait a week or so before dye will take in my hair.  I am also now contemplating going for the whole paramore orange thing.  There are only certain points in time when a girl can pull of that kind of style and well... The time may be now.  What do you think?

For some reason and perhaps because of rather than in spite of my hair... I'm feeling sexy!  Lush.

Ja Rule Ft. Case - Livin' It Up
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Impulse Shopping & Interesting Aquaintances

The last few days have been just what the doctor ordered.  

For a girl who grew up playing outdoors and always had a healthy glow to her skin, these last couple of years living in a place I'm sure could be in the running for rainiest city in Europe has seen me practically turn into a vampire.  I used to be the girl who went brown as a berry from just looking at the sun, these days however I need to suncream my ass up and consistently monitor for signs of reddening.  I love the sun.  I love the heat, the feeling it gives you and most of all, I like having a little colour to me.  It makes me feel/look alive.

I spent Friday hanging out with (Can't remember what nickname I gave here so I will need to insert later ??) and her kids in her garden.  We played mankala (I taught her as figured a little sunshine entertainment wouldn't go a miss), listened to music, drank squash, ate a chicken breast burger off the BBQ and topped the day off with a rocket ice-lolly.  Lovely!  

On the way home from (??) I popped into the supermarket and on spying some 'colour b4' I quickly picked my mobile out of my pocket and within a few minutes had purchased a radical new colour for my hair from amazon, the colour b4 was in my basket and just for good measure I nipped onto ebay and purchased 'clip in bangs' to be dyed and rocked to bring me an all over brand new summer sun hairstyle.  Watch this space, I'll post some pics.  It's a good job some of the things in life can't be bought with 3 clicks of a button.

Friday night I mooched on the sofa and then skyped a friend I met playing a game on my phone (yes, yes, a game on my phone!), lets call her Aurora.  Aurora and I have spoken maybe twice before along with a couple of the other people that potter about on the game.  It usually starts off with a 'lets chat about the other players' and then rapidly turns into what we now refer to as 'cocktail Friday'.  Despite the time differences for some of us, and the serious differences in lifestyle choices, there are perhaps 5 of us that gel over a wicked sense of humour and a likening for goofy chat and cocktails.  I am not one of these 'gamer' types, but I have to say, this last 9months or so have seen a little bit of banter and an hour or so of playing/chatting on this bog standard generic game on my phone put a smile on my face.  Aurora is usually the quiet one in the group, contributing a little and laughing a lot.  On Friday we spoke just the two of us for the first time and I haven't laughed so much in ages.  I have definitely found a kindred spirit.

Saturday saw me meet Red for a short 5 mile walk, a few hours in the park reading celeb magazines followed by dinner at her place.  Red isn't much of a cook and unfortunately presented me with food items I equally dislike (salmon - I wish I could like fish, but I just don't. Mashed potato - mashed food is for the physically impaired and those without teeth.  So long as I can chew, I am gonna chew.  Finally the dish was topped off with peas - the only vegetable I dislike) so it was a bit of a 'hold your nose and gulp' dinner for me, but the chat was great and the day a relaxing sunny one.  Red and I have a tennis court booked for next weekend and a film festival event lined up on Tuesday in a bid to get out more lol.

Saturday night I ended up speaking with Aurora again.  I can safely say that the girl has more stories than I do, and that is saying something!  I've told her that she should consider writing a blog.  Wonder if she will give it a bash?!

Today I've got nothing lined up which is a shame as the sun is definitely still shining so hopefully someone will give me a dial and I can whisk myself away somewhere suitably sunny.  

This coming week definitely counts for more of the following:  Sunshine, BBQs, ice lollies, banter with Aurox and quite possibly a meet up with Beeze.

Farewell - First One On The Blog

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YeeHahh

I can't lie... I almost lost my way.

Since my last posting the last phase of my life has officially ended and I'm firmly in 'anything could happen' land.  I've gone through a few stages along the way...

Numbness

Knowing I was leaving my job but not really 'feeling' it.  This lead to zero activity on the pro-active front and an all round grey mentality.

Logic

Due to a realisation that while numbness wasn't such a terrible place to be considering the tears, stress and mass panic surrounding my final few days in the workplace, I decided to tick a few boxes.  Handovers were completed, contracts signed off, things put in place, discounts allocated and CV updated.  I also made the decision that while I love my flat I need to be mobile as I don't necessarily want to stay in this city so the cats will soon relocate to mums (for the time being) and I will be letting my apartment go in favor of couch surfing and flat shares.  Storage organised.

Thoughtful

An exceptionally dangerous stage that can often lead to procrastination which as we all know is the enemy of anyone trying to make things happen.  This pretty much came about during my most recent bridesmaid duties trip.  Having officially left the office for the last time and having said my goodbyes while being met with a myriad of 'what are you gonna do's', my mind wandered a little and I have to say, my lazy kicked in.  Then I had to remind myself "This is not a holiday".

Panic

I don't know if it was the constant stream of 'what now' questions, the realisation that the sum of money I'm leaving with isn't enough for me to become some mad entrepreneur or eccentric, the lack of a planned day or just the look in peoples eyes when my response to the above is 'I'm not sure' that kicked it in but around 48hrs ago panic officially took hold.  I was in cold sweat, clammy palm territory.

Excited/Productive

Luckily yesterday what I hope will be the final phase (or at least my home for a little while) kicked in.  I have been waking early, hitting the net, networking, making calls, scanning for jobs and all round getting my house in order.  I can't say I have this plan nailed, but what I can say is that I'm confident if I attack the coming weeks with the same level of force I have this morning then I'm pretty certain I'll be in a shiny new job within a month.  *crosses fingers and toes

No-one prepares you for those moments in time when you are faced with a decision like whether or not to take voluntary redundancy.  I realise now that while I would never want to be in the predicament of having enforced redundancy thrown at me, to a certain extend it would be easier to deal with.  Having to make a choice to leave somewhere with a solid income in search of the unknown when you are single and know there is no-one else kicking about to pay the bills is a seriously daunting thought.  Come to think of it,  I only know of one other person in the same circumstance that decided to take the plunge and use the situation as an opportunity to look for something new.  

A history of being flighty is something I absolutely hold claim to, spontaneity is definitely in my blood and as for a need for change, absolutely.  The thing is, despite all of these characteristics I've never jumped with such uncertainty.   I mean, yes I've left a job without another lined up, but always at a time the job market was booming and never with any fear that I couldn't have something suitable lined up by the end of the week (6 days is the longest period of time I've been unemployed).  This time is way, way different.  The job market is terrible unless you want to work in IT, Recruitment or Engineering and let me just say (Disaster, Never again and Useless) to that. 

We are definitely in a time of change bloggers, no doubt about it.

Here's the rest

Bridesmaid dress bought and hanging up in my closet, Catchup with Baron, Herb and Clio went well and factored in some live music, plenty of booze, sunshine and a BBQ.  Balloo is currently in a phase of depression which I'm trying to help him through although I'm feeling a little peeved that he falls off the planet somewhat when he is ok again.  Beez and I are still in touch on/off via text and I'm sure we will catch up again in person soon.  No other men are on the scene and to be honest I really, genuinely don't have time for that at the moment. 

Is it possible that without realising I've somehow created my own mid-life crisis?

Robbie Williams - Old Before I Die
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