Half In & Half Out

I'm still contemplating running.

Last night I removed myself from every social media site I'm part of, deleted all my social networking apps and grabbed my lease from the kitchen drawer to see the earliest date I could jump ship.

I don't really have that many things since moving into this flat, what I do have would probably get me by a month or so, I've a heap of annual leave pay from work to take and I know mum would take the cats.  I would need to say goodbye to a few people and make sure I came back for Herb & Barron's wedding but other than that I'd be no worse off anywhere else than here.

Maybe sometimes in life it is good to throw caution to the wind and cleanse your soul.  

But what cleanses my soul...

• Music
• Swimming
• Fresh air
• Candlelight
• The ocean

I'm going to jump in the car this weekend and head to one of the two places I go when I really need to think things through.  Yep, I think I need to sort out my head and start checking off my list of people to see.

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Courrier - Between

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD9jg1WR66o

Holding On & Letting Go

I've been pretty sick for this last little while which is why I haven't been blogging.  I'm not completely back on form yet and am sleeping most the day but thought I should check in.

I'm never sure if time in your own company is a good or bad thing.  I tend to get really frustrated when I can't get a minute to myself, but this last week or so I feel like all I have done is think, either while I'm sat up or when I'm sleeping.  I've had the same types of dreams over and over and over again.  I think all this rain check has done is allowed me to see that if I'm not careful my life is going to spiral out of control.

I want so badly to just let go to everything and blow wherever the wind takes me.  I feel like that's what I need.  A completely new start.  A new place.  New faces.  New feelings.  New experiences.  Air.  

Right now it's like I can't breathe.

So here's what I never told you about in my blog before... I'm someone with well... I have to fight with my own body a lot of the time and right now I think it might be winning.  

Sometimes I think if I just left it all behind... everything I know and everyone I love, I might just find the strength inside that I need to become who I am supposed to be.  The question is, is it important to have the right job, the right salary and be in the place people expect you to be at 30, or is it ok to throw it all away - run away from responsibility and embrace life like I'm starting my 20s all over again?  

I just need to take a deep breath of air.  Fresh, cold and icy on my lungs.

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Ross Copperman - Holding On & Letting Go

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Awr_jzijeIU&list=HL1351366685&feature=mh_lolz

Migraine

I'll be back as soon as I can look at my laptop without wincing.  Much to fill you in on bloggers. x

Guitar Soothes The Soul

A lot has happened since I last wrote bloggers, but tonight isn't the night.

Sometimes the only think you need in life is some time to contemplate things in your own head space and the perfect track...

Fuzzy Felt

So due to cancelled plans and a want to see each other I shall be meeting Navy boy tomorrow for the first time.  I am soooo excited and mega nervous.

We don't know all the regular things about each other like job, family, life etc. as the  conversation has been completely random and unforced.  It is a really bizzare situation to be in but I somehow feel ok with it as he dropped me a text to say he was thinking/feeling the same.  Talk about adding pressure... You meet someone, get to know what makes them laugh, talk about things that don't matter much as you know you can't meet for a while and somehow without realising you are suddenly smiling so much it looks like you have been sleeping with a coat hanger in your mouth.  Such a scary meet when you really both know that everything is now pinned on physical attraction.

Scary bananas!

We aren't meeting until tomorrow and already I have butterflies.  I think by tomorrow morning the butterflies will have made way for a crowd of mini clogg wearing people doing a mosh pit in my tummy.

Thank goodness I've a really great friend in Cilla who is going to get me through the 'omg I want to cancel' moments lol

Lifehouse - Hanging by a Moment

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ESWjziG5B54

Jinx Ouch

Ok so yesterday I was asking you guys what you thought of protruding collar bones and micro dermals and today bloggers it is clear that I jinxed myself...  I woke this morning to a red, swollen and clearly infected micro dermal on the left hand side - 2 years I have had these and yet today for no reason at all my body has decided to reject and start pushing one out?!?!

I am currently sat on my couch, laptop at the ready to call the piercing studios in the area at 9am to see if someone will let me come in so they can have a look.  I've a sneaking suspicion they will need to cut the current implant out and place a new anchor altogether.  Whatever they need to do I don't want to  have it removed and not replaced.  I would look daft with just one and I have seen what they need to do to remove them - scalpel ahoy!  So there is no way I want that either.

*sniff, I love my micro dermals.  I wonder what caused this to happen??

In other news, I met G-star last night as he is kitty sitting for me next week as I'm heading to London for a few work things.  Had a really nice time catching up quickly over coffee and a key handover and it turns out that G-star has taken my lead and has put himself on match.com and has his first date this Saturday which he is thoroughly nervous about.  I am however sure he will do great, he is a good looking guy, had a great physique, dresses well, smells good and yeah he is a little shy and needs a kick up the bum to step outside his comfort zone, but with the right girl he would soar.  I can't wait to hear how it went :)

My life in relation to guys on the other hand is really interesting at the moment.  A couple of guys I have known for a while and are recently single seem to have ear marked me for the schmooze treatment, I'm doing pretty well with the online dating thing and can keep my evenings/weekends interesting for the foreseeable future.  The exciting news however is that despite not being able to meet up yet Navy boy and I have had a couple of random text message conversations and he seems soooooo right for me (and yes bloggers, I normally would be very anti this type of behaviour before meeting face to face), we however can't seem to get a break and every time he is free I'm not and visa versa.  We are both away next week, me with work and him visiting friends and family as he is due to deploy in November again for a few months so the following week/weekend we have both agreed to wiggle schedules/ditch plans to make it happen.

In true Ser3ndiptiy style, it couldn't be simple... but I am pretty sure this is a watch this space scenario ;)

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Girls Aloud - Promise
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y3qxUqwrNDA&feature=BFa&list=PLD0C192FD9C0DCC9F&shuffle=562266

Bones

So what do you guys think, is it sexy if you can see a girls collar bones sticking out or does it gross you out?

I love my collar bones and they haven't been sticking out for a while now, I told my friend that it is what I am aiming for with this weight loss thing and she seemed to think I was mental?  I think its cute, it also means my micro dermals are more obvious.

Thoughts?